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Most f-ed up or screwed up joke?


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What is the most fucked up, screwed up, and totally wrong joke you have ever heard, or sentence that someone had said?

My friend Sean posted a bulletin on Myspace that contained the following text:

"Attention! If you are currently looking for a college, Virginia Tech now has 33 openings! Apply today!

...I agree, he is going to hell too, but it was kinda' funny in a way. :o

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Blonde, brunette, and a redhead go camping for a week together. During the trip, the brunette and the redhead come up with a good joke to play on the blonde. The brunette and redhead decided to gut a squirrel and plan to dump it's guts below the blonde while she used the bathroom in the woods. When the time came, the plan went accordingly and they secretly snuck back to the campsite. Suddenly, they heard a loud scream and nothing else for 10 minutes. After the 10 minutes, they saw the blonde walking back to camp and they asked what happened. She replied: "You're not going to believe this! I shit so hard that my intestines came out!! But thanks to God and these two fingers, I got them all back in."

:o:blink::blink::blink:

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a redneck girl desperately asks her father to borrow the car for the night to go to the movies. but the dad says "only if you suck my dick first"

so she responds "ewww im not doing that"

the dad says "well do you want the car or not?"

so the girl says "....omg fine...."

so she goes to suck his dick and says "ugh...this tastes like shit."

and he father replies "ohhhh yehhhhh, your brother has the car tonight"

not the grosses but one of the "grosser" ones that actually make me laugh

then theres all the dead baby jokes and the one about the blond picking her scabs... :S

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a redneck girl desperately asks her father to borrow the car for the night to go to the movies. but the dad says "only if you suck my dick first"

so she responds "ewww im not doing that"

the dad says "well do you want the car or not?"

so the girl says "....omg fine...."

so she goes to suck his dick and says "ugh...this tastes like shit."

and he father replies "ohhhh yehhhhh, your brother has the car tonight"

not the grosses but one of the "grosser" ones that actually make me laugh

then theres all the dead baby jokes and the one about the blond picking her scabs... :S

LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL

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Q: What's the worst thing in the world?

A: A pile of dead babies

Q: What's worse than that?

A: The one at the bottom eating his way to the top.

Q: What's worse than that?

A: When it gets to the top and then jumps back in for seconds.

Q: What do you get when you cut a dead baby with a razor?

A: An erection.

Terrible.

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this happened a couple years ago. back in the time when I was a "Magic The Gathering" card player.

I was at my local card store when some guy comes back from the fast food restaurant just besides and says: "my god was this girl ever smoking hot!" ...etc..etc. (the girl that worked there was like 15 years old.)

so then the guys start talking about how hot she is and everything.

and then this 29 year old, big, fat and bearded dude (looks like a dwarf) says the following: "she is so hot I would take her pussy juice and make popsicles with it!"

I will let you imagine the looks on our faces after he said that...

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What is the most fucked up, screwed up, and totally wrong joke you have ever heard, or sentence that someone had said?

My friend Sean posted a bulletin on Myspace that contained the following text:

"Attention! If you are currently looking for a college, Virginia Tech now has 33 openings! Apply today!

...I agree, he is going to hell too, but it was kinda' funny in a way. :)

i lol'd had as hell when i read that

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At a local music store near me, a guy with a deformed hand was trying to play drums. He was trying (ill give him that) but it sounded crappy and was annoying the hell out of a kid trying to play guitar in the guitar section.

So he goes up to the guy with the deformed hand and told him "You might as well have just amputated your hand. Not like its doing you much good now."

We all just walked away.

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At a local music store near me, a guy with a deformed hand was trying to play drums. He was trying (ill give him that) but it sounded crappy and was annoying the hell out of a kid trying to play guitar in the guitar section.

So he goes up to the guy with the deformed hand and told him "You might as well have just amputated your hand. Not like its doing you much good now."

We all just walked away.

Oh. Fucking. Snap.

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At a local music store near me, a guy with a deformed hand was trying to play drums. He was trying (ill give him that) but it sounded crappy and was annoying the hell out of a kid trying to play guitar in the guitar section.

So he goes up to the guy with the deformed hand and told him "You might as well have just amputated your hand. Not like its doing you much good now."

We all just walked away.

lol that ones a funny =X

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A guys walking down a quiet, deserted beach alone and after much time he comes across a young boy, who is alone and crying. He asks the boy, "What's wrong?" and he explains to him that "My mother went in to swim all alone and a shark attacked her. Then my dad went in to save her life but the shark was too quick and killed them both."

The guy takes a look around, unzips his pants, and tells the boy, "I guess this just isn't your lucky day..."

^_^

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